What Was Funny About 2009

Was there anything funny about this past year? Was there even anything good about it? Here, for your consideration, we present some comments on 2009.

The Economy
In the embattled state of California "The economy is so bad that parents in Beverly Hills are considering raising their own children."

According to one lady: "The economy is so bad, my sister had an exorcism but couldn't afford to pay for it, and they re-possessed her!"

"I'm a walking economy," someone else was overheard to say.
"My hairline's in recession, my waist is a victim of inflation, and together they're putting me in a deep depression."

The Banks
One chap walked into a bank and said, "I want to open a joint account with somebody who has money."

Of course he might not have been so keen if he'd seen this news headline: Isle of Dogs Bank collapses. Retrievers called in.

Banks have been in for plenty of stick in the last months, as has the government. Good thing then that they work so well together. What is a bank? "A bank is a dignified institution that was established for people to have a place to keep the government's money until tax time."

The Recession
The best explanation comes from that genius of economics, Homer Simpson:
"When you gave me that money, you said I wouldn't have to repay it 'til the future," Homer told his mortgage broker in a recent episode. "This isn't the future. It's the lousy, stinking now!"

Homer Simpson isn't alone in having taken Josh Billings advice to heart: "Always live within your income", he quipped, " even if you have to borrow money to do so."

This recession has reminded us there's nothing new under the sun. In 1933, when the grip of the Great Depression was at its absolute tightest, the New York Sun made mention of a satirical sign hanging in the front window of a Brooklyn grocery store. "Due to the depression," it said, "credit will hereafter be extended only to persons over the age of 80 years if accompanied by their grandparents."

Professor David Watson, of the Institute of Education in London, put it this way: " There is never enough money, but there used to be."

Unpredictable Currency
Perhaps the most unpredictable currency is language. Language trumps everything when it comes to mis-communication, mis-interpretation and mis-placed intent.

Toyota announced that it is developing a car that shuts down if the driver is drunk. Immediately, rival Ford announced that "Ford drivers do not need to be drunk for their cars to shut down."

A man called the First National Bank asking for some information about bonds. Conversion or redemption? asked the bank clerk. There was a pause. "Pardon me," said the man, "Do I have the First National Bank or the First Presbyterian Church?

Overheard: two middle aged ladies in conversation as follows:
'Do you remember our French neighbour, Monsieur Chouin?'
'Yes, indeed.'
'Do you remember I told you he had voted for the BNP at the European elections?'
'Yes, terrible.'
'Yesterday he told me it was all a big mistake, he thought it means "Banque Nationale de Paris".'

All, however, is not lost. As we near the end of 2009 we find that the world has not ended, the sun still shines, and there's never been more material available for us to laugh at our failings. In the words of old favourite Bill Cosby: "If you can find humour in anything, even poverty, you can survive it."